(no subject)

Things that suck: having cramps and a hacking cough at the same time. I feel like I've just done 20,000 sit-ups.

Reading an interesting thread on Salon's Table Talk boards about women's magazines: "Tools of Satan?" I'm beginning to be of an accord with that. There really aren't many magazines I enjoy anymore. I have a subscription to Nylon, since last April, and they've sent it maybe half that many times: something is messed up in their subscription department. I'll flip through Allure in a store to see what's new in makeup and perfume, which is junk food but harmless. I have a free subscription to W that I will happily let run out because it's lame: I don't give even one shit about a 14-year-old Princess of Monaco. I can't even bring myself to touch Marie Claire (which I used to like until I really put some thought into it), Glamour (which was OK til they changed editors), Cosmo (get thee behind me), and Mademoiselle (hi, nobody's home).

I like Real Simple, though I have the same complaints that everyone else does: the stuff they feature is often too expensive (there is nothing "simple" about a $500 dry-clean-only sweater). I like the design of SimplyCity, but the content tends to be less useful (seems to be geared primarily at Sex and the City characters: I can see Miranda and Charlotte reading it) - still, adorable, inspiring illustrations, from an artistic perspective. I always try to pick up Somerset Studios, which is a luscious paper-art magazine, and the only thing I've ever seen that manages to make rubber stamping look cool. I look at a few design magazines but don't buy them, and other things tend to be here and there. I'm almost totally divorced from women's lifestyle rags.

Well, anyway, it's time for me to finish up my honey ginseng green tea and go get edumacated.

(no subject)

Getting frustrated by the variety of educational sites out there.

Specifically, it's that time of year & I'm doing something I actually should have done a few months ago, but I was too fuzzy-headed at the time: going to the sites of various schools and requesting applications. This is more time-consuming than it seems, because some schools (art schools, mostly) completely bury their information under a load of Flash animations, and/or won't allow you to have their phone number unless you fill out an online info request form first (every time I've ever filled out an info request form, I've had to call anyway because the info took months to arrive). Parsons is the worst in this regard.

Right now I am looking at the School of Visual Arts site, which is a bit less arcane and pretentious. I've already been through Mass Arts (legacy with a friend on the faculty, but I doubt either will help me get in), MFA School / Tufts, and Northeastern. Still to go are a few NYC places (places Autumn has talked about, since she's been to basically every major college in the area for at least a class or two) and, Eris help me, Cleveland places.

The NYC places, in general, seem to be more difficult in terms of admission requirements, I think simply for the cachet of the following statement: "I went to art school in New York City." You know what I mean. & none of these places are Cooper Union, either (if you're good enough to get in to Cooper Union, there's no tuition fee AT ALL).

I feel so stressed. I have to really get to work on my portfolio. A problem I've had with that is that a lot of schools want in-class assignments, and I have found so many assignments at my school totally uninspiring. Some that I've done well with are disqualified from portfolio consideration, because they are riffs on someone else's art or style (for instance, a painting I did that I'm proud of, a big enlargement of an anime-style eye). So I have to scramble to do, like, ten things that I'm proud of sometime in the next month or so. Things I'm Proud Of usually take at least a week of solid work, at least 12 hours each day.

I'm feeling a little discouraged when I should be feeling energized. Maybe I should take a whole semester off just for portfolio work... but I can't afford to do that. Pretty much at all.

I wish I had more ideas or more time or less freaking illness.

accomplished. anxious. inclement.

ploo.

I am feeling so zombiefied today that I just turned down a nice dinner at the Olive Garden. Perhaps I will change my mind. Fried Zucchini can make any tired and crampy and achy and zoned and sad young lady turn her frown upside-down. I just do not at the moment feel like moving more than five feet in any direction. Five feet is an optimistic estimate.

I got all of my school packet request forms sent in... now I just have to cool my heels until they arrive. I should be getting five or six of them. I'm somewhat concerned that I'll have to take the SATs again. My scores were very very good (I was a wanktastic overachiever in high school, when I was more motivated), and I'm somewhat afraid that I will have problems with the math section, or be forced to do SAT-2 tests on things I haven't studied in years. (do they even have one for Latin? i haven't done any science in 3 years or math in 2. no foreign language since 1994. etc.)

This is all making me angsty. Not a lot of time to get everything done. I hate stress and pressure and it seems like there is always so much to be done at any one time.

I also checked out airfare prices for my trip. If I went on certain dates it would cost like $10 less, but to travel any day of the week I can get a ticket for about $170. That's pretty good. I haven't completely selected dates, but I think I'll be there from around the 23-31 of March, give or take a day in either direction. Autumn and I, both sicklings who tire easily, are trying to plan low-stress outings.

Right now I just want to curl up under the down comforter and hug Mokey and cry myself to sleep***, but... I just shouldn't, I have too much stuff I need to do.

***I'm not really sure why I want to cry, because I'm not sad... just stressed and tired and achy. Figure that one out. (I mean, I know the reasons, I just don't feel like listing them for myself. When you have a cold or flu or something, it's easy to forget that you have a chronic illness underlying it, because the unusual amounts of coughing and snot overshadow everything else. & I always forget how miserable I am a few days into Being A Girl. Oh, the novelty. I think I will shut up now.)