(no subject)

[verbminx]

I'm sitting here looking at pages related not specifically to CFIDS but to candidiasis, which is what I am trying to treat right now. Since it's largely an "alternative" area of medicine, there isn't a consensus on what should be done, what to take, what foods to avoid... and 99% of information pages are selling their own specific product.

Some say no sweeteners at all, but cheeses are OK as long as they aren't moldy. Some say stevia and, after a week or so, fruit, are OK as sweeteners, but no cheese is allowed whatsoever. The contradictions just go on and on.

& finally it came to me in a big swelling of misery... I am so tired of being ill. I have been ill very frequently since 1987, with some reprieves here and there; I have almost certainly been ill for the past twelve to eighteen months with virtually no reprieves (if my head doesn't hurt, I have a sore throat or an ear infection; if not that, I have a churning stomachache; if not that, all my joints ache like mad).

So I'm angry and sad and I don't know what to do... I'm just tired of feeling this way. One thing, though... I'm not going to fucking cry.

Comments

[rienhasnolife.livejournal.com]

bah. we should make an island and live there, glorying in our illnesses. bah.

[ragdoll.livejournal.com]

Damn, I was going to say that too. Verbminx knows about *my* state of health. *sigh*

[verbminx.livejournal.com]

haha... read what i said to rien...
besides... where would we get really yummy food from if we lived all alone on an island?

Re:

[ragdoll.livejournal.com]

Um, we'd have it flown in special from Dean & DeLuca. ;-)

[verbminx.livejournal.com]

oh well, that is a plan. soup, beautiful soup! soooooooup!

Re:

[ragdoll.livejournal.com]

and yummy turkey with red rice salad or whatever it was that I ate! :-)

[verbminx.livejournal.com]

hehe... if we made that kind of island, we'd have to import healthy people to cook and clean for us and stuff. and then they'd take over. =)

Re:

[rienhasnolife.livejournal.com]

we can train monkeys to cook and clean. oh no wait, *thinking* planet of the apes. maybe koalas? pandas?

[verbminx.livejournal.com]

them koalas, they get violent.

i'm thinking monkeys sound good. but small ones. and then they would also be pets and hang out with us and entertain us by setting up complicated poo-flinging olympic competitions.

in the magic mountain, most of the waiters at the sanatorium seem to be dwarfs.

[ragdoll.livejournal.com]

Not monkeys! How about androids? Then they could do all sorts of things for us. ;-)

[verbminx.livejournal.com]

yeah! MANdroids! rock on!

Re:

[ragdoll.livejournal.com]

They could all be Bowiebots like the The Road to Mars. I wouldn't say no to that...ever! :-)

[jet.livejournal.com]

yuck.

i can only imagine how frustrating and depressing it would be to feel like crap ALL the time.

you are way too young to be going through this sort of thing...

i wish i could suggest something really wonderful, but its a mysterious condition you've got.

you are a very smart and very sweet girl... and you possess all sorts of great qualities with which to work. hang in there, and try to keep your stress levels low. is there any sort of magical pill the doctor could give you for your more frequent complaints? i would think there would be, and that you've either tried it with no luck, or are currently on it and its not helping. bleh.

i hope something turns up to give you relief soon.

have you been feeling stressed lately? i'm not the authority on CFS, but i think i remember stress having something to do with it being extra bothersome...

maybe you should get some more tests to see if there are any other nagging problems that aren't being accounted for (?)

i don't know. i wish i could fix you.

[verbminx.livejournal.com]

no magical pills, but thanks for the rest of it. :) i do have a few more tests to go thru... it's possible i don't even have cfids, but if i don't, it's probably something even worse. (blah)

and yeah, lots of stress. tons of stress starting from the time my stepfather went into the hospital a few years ago. it's gotten better in the past few months, i'll admit, but i'm still not FEELING all that great. poo.

[ex-snuggles511.livejournal.com]

A lot of those symptoms sound ear related. I went through a year or so of ear infection problems, and it's possible you have a more serious type of infection that isn't being properly treated. I suggest an ear specialist. A surprising number of regular doctors aren't well versed in more complicated ear treatment.

[verbminx.livejournal.com]

thanks, but I used to go to an ENT years ago, and it didn't do me any good. I have a lot of sinus problems related to a lower-resistance immune system & some mineral deficiencies and food sensitivities, plus some skin conditions in my ear canal (eczema, and the dermatologist wasn't able to help). The ENTs messed me up more than they helped me, but I won't go into gruesome detail. :)